Corn Maze, October

Last weekend, Paul and I went with a group from our church to the local corn maze. The general attitude among the group was that even if this was a bust, at least it was a new experience for all of us.

We were given a map that quickly turned out to be utterly useless. Some (probably) teenage hooligans had gone through the maze and taken out the 10 informational guideposts. The Boy Scout troop that was putting the posts back didn't do too good at getting them back in the correct place. And they tuckered out before the task was completed so they put three posts side-by-side. Paul declared that I wouldn't have made a good teenage hooligan because I would have caused trouble by simply knocking the posts down not actually moving them which is, of course, the way a true hooligan operates. But Paul decided he would have made a great Boy Scout because he, too, would have stuck all the posts together although it would have been more to mess with the visitors to the maze.

It was an enjoyable afternoon and I hope Paul and I will go back again to future mazes. The group did decide that the corn maze might be better earlier in the season, when the corn stalks are still green and before other wandering groups had trampled new pathways. And before vandals and Boy Scouts got ahold of the guideposts. Despite our best wanderings, we never could find two of the posts.

Kate and Sam, who were leading the charge--this is shortly before they decided the map was completely and utterly useless

It was a beautiful October afternoon--cool, crisp air with beautiful, sunny blue skies

Looking through the corn stalks

Sandia Mountain as a backdrop for the changing leaves of the cottonwoods

Owning a flashlight is probably one of the requirements for adulthood

We, like many in ABQ, have an evaporative cooler a.k.a swamp cooler for our A/C. The annual maintenance is one of the many challenges that as been thrown as us in the How to Be a Grown-up game. We're getting better about the hook-up in the spring. We buy the new pads early and usually get up on the roof to do the maintance and turn it on before it gets freakishly hot.

What we're not so good at doing is getting it disconnected in the fall. We've been in our house for six years and I think Paul has only actually unhooked the cooler once during daylight. That was the first year we were in the house and the builder did it for us. So I'm not sure that actually counts. Since then, we always talk about how we need to get up on the roof starting in mid-September and it isn't until we notice a weather report showing that it might actually dip below freezing that we finally do something about it.

We've had a cool fall and haven't needed the A/C in over a month. But, you guessed it, it wasn't until tonight that we decided to do anything about it.

At 8:00, Paul came downstairs declaring that he'd seen a weather report on the Internet and he'd decided to disconnect the cooler. It's a short process--10 minutes or so--and probably more exciting in the dark. Which is a good thing because WE DON'T OWN A FLASHLIGHT. How can people not have a flashlight? I'm not sure but we've managed to do it. I'm sure we have this conversation every year at 8:00 on a random night in October when Paul is headed onto the roof. He finally scrounged up a Mini-Maglite that thankfully worked and unhooked the cooler with no surprises or belly flops off the two-story roof. And because I'm no longer in charge of the task of turning on the heater after I managed to screw it up and had to call out a repairman who basically hit the heater with a rubber mallet and charged us $75, Paul did that as well.

Of course, when the heater kicks on, we'll be reminded of another of the many Things We Need to Get To--fixing the vent in our bedroom that has rattled for six years.

Ten Things from my weekend

1. Airports really need some type of ventilation system. Between the cooking smells from restaurants and the masses of humanity, there is a lot of funk happening.

2. Crazy drivers follow you wherever you go. Hello? Tailgating at 70 m.p.h. in the rain? Not necessarily the wisest thing to do.

3. I like my sister Donna and I'm so glad she's willing to take time to cart me all over the Metroplex to go shopping and visiting friends.

4. As much as I think I might like another cat, I don't have the energy/inclination to handle a kitten or the fur. Perhaps an old, hairless creature would be the way to go.

5. Shopping is always more fun with someone who has similar taste to you (because then you can make fun of the crazy things you find).

6. It is always nice to see all my friends who live in D/FW and it was wonderful to see all their babies and new houses.

7. Visiting D/FW makes me realize how few friends I have in New Mexico (that sounds a little pathetic--it's not that I don't have friends here but I spent 23 years there vs. 8 years here so it just follows that I'd have more friends and that I've known the TX people longer).

8. It's a little scary how competitive I can be at an auction (live or silent--doesn't matter; I must win at any cost).

9. It always surprises me how much bad stuff I can eat before I actually get a stomachache.

10. Upon arrival back in ABQ, it is wonderful to walk out of the gate area and see my husband's face smiling back at me.

Because before too long, it won't be that exciting to ride in Aunt Carrie's car

On Sunday, the oh-so-big 3-year-old Abigail asked to ride in my car on the way to breakfast. She "likes to ride in Aunt Carrie's silver car because it's fast." I drive a Subaru so it's not like I'm tooling around in a flashy sportscar. Plus I'm even more cautious when I have the kid in the car with me so I'm not sure where she got the "fast" part but I'll take it. It's fun to listen to her prattle on and on so I enjoy having her in the car with me. Here are bits of the conversation we had Sunday morning.

Upon falling off her bike before we left the house: I've got a booboo but I'm OK! No blood! I'm OK!

After I greeted her when I got into the car with a "Hello, Sunshine!": I'm not the sunshine. That's the sunshine (pointing out the window). I'm Abigail and I'm a girl and I'm down here.

As I was driving: Do you know where we're going? I don't think this is the way. Are you sure this is the right way? Where are we going? As long as it's not IHOP. I got sick the last time I went to IHOP.

The door lock: Oh, it's good to lock the doors so they don't open. (I locked the doors) Oh, wait, don't lock me in! We need to have the doors unlocked.

I also had a running commentary on the way home about whether or not the car in front of us was her parents' car (it was), if her dad was driving (he was), and that red lights mean stop and that her momma's car was old and that she liked the song on the radio even though she didn't know it and on and on and on.

A happy ending for an old story

Fight Matadors, for Tech
There is an old Mac Davis song entitled "Texas in my Rearview Mirror" and the chorus is that he thought happiness was Lubbock, Texas, in his rearview mirror--that he just wanted to grow up and get out of that dusty little town.

Funny, because for so long, it was just where I wanted to be.

Songs of love we'll sing to thee
We went to Lubbock this weekend for the Texas Tech Homecoming game. As we were driving there, it occurred to me that the first Tech football game I attended was 15 years ago. There was a boy from my hometown who was a sophomore at Tech--whenever he'd come home, we'd go out on dates, and this being the era before e-mail and cell phones, we wrote frequent letters and made occasional phone calls in the other times. This boy invited me, along with my family, to come to Lubbock for a football game. My parents agreed (much to my surprise and delight) and we chose a weekend in October when my sister Amy was running in a cross country meet in Lubbock.

Bear our banners, far and wide
He picked me up from the cross country meet and we spent the day together in Lubbock. I was all of 16 years old (but almost 17 so I thought I was so grown-up) and just thought it was the coolest thing to be on the Tech campus with a college boy. I'm sure I was hoping that no one would realize I was just a junior in high school and trying to play it so cool. He showed me all around campus--I had a rather eye-opening experience at his dorm--and at the game, I sat in the student section with him. I remember being amazed at the crowd and the band--just taking it all in. It was just where I wanted to be and I started imagining a future at Tech and with this boy.

Ever to be our pride
We went to a game the next year as well. It was the weekend before Thanksgiving and while I don't remember the opponent, I do remember that I have never been colder. It was a wet, cold, windy day and we spent most of the first half facing one endzone because then our backs were to the wind. (We, along with most of the faithful, left at halftime.) Since I was now an ever-so-adult 18, the boy took me out dancing and then we went to a real-live college party. I can still remember telling one of the friends that I while I might be in high school, I wasn't an idiot after he told me that it was OK to eat the fruit from the trash can punch.

And then the boy broke my heart. He told me that he'd met a girl and he wanted to make it more serious--that she might just be "the one." We'd always had a very curious open relationship--both of us dated other people but they had never been "serious." It was just crushing to hear that he thought this girl was someone worth ending whatever strange little thing we had going. Not even two weeks earlier, I'd sat with him as he cried after his father's funeral. I was ready for us to be "serious." I wanted to be the one. I was sending in college applications and Tech was at the top of my list. Because of him.

Fearless champions ever be
I cried the entire four hour trip home. I decided not to go to Tech the following fall. I decided to move on.

When he came home at Christmas, he admitted that he and "the one" had broken up. Seems she just wanted to get laid. And so did he. But that wasn't much to build a relationship on. We dated a bit again after that, but he'd really hurt me. I know now I was just a child when we started dating, despite however old I felt at 16, but I'd really believed that we would have a "grown-up" relationship when I went to college. That we could be more than whatever we were when we were apart. I admit I was scheming to marry this boy (but everyone else in town was having the same thoughts as well, including him).

That one football weekend changed everything that would finally bring me to this point in my life.

Stand on heights of victory
I chose to go to North Texas in the fall (well, my mother didn't give me much choice when I'd decided I'd changed my mind about Tech in May). I met another boy who I ended up dating for two years, although that mostly became a lesson in what I *didn't* want in a relationship. I did transfer to Tech at the start of my sophomore year and I saw the boy from time to time on campus (he'd "extended" his senior year by a semester). We became friends again. We even dated a bit the summer between my sophomore and junior year. But I just couldn't do it again. Too much time had passed. Too much had changed between us.

Strive for honor, evermore
But something very good did come out of that relationship--that boy introduced me to the one I married. He and Paul had been great friends as undergrads and he introduced us because he thought we'd be friends. Before he left for graduate school in Michigan, he tried to make Paul and I promise that we wouldn't date--neither of us would because we just couldn't imagine that happening.

I made Paul call him two months later when we started dating. He wasn't thrilled (OK, he was really, really angry with me but not Paul for whatever reason) but he wasn't surprised. He was in our wedding four years later. Sadly, he committed suicide a couple of years ago due to severe depression and a wife who didn't support his efforts to get the medical help he needed to deal with it. I often wonder what would have happened if that one weekend 14 years ago had gone differently. I wouldn't change my life now, except to have that boy still be a part of it.

But from time to time, I do wonder.

Long live the Matadors!
So, here I am some 15 years later in a completely different place (literally--Albuquerque? what's up with that?) than what I'd envisioned my future would hold. I'm not nearly as self-assured or as smart at that 16-almost 17!-year-old girl. But I am much happier with who I am and what my life holds. And I also know (at least, I'm learning) that no amount of planning can ever be as wonderful as just letting the future take us where it will.

Part of the happy ending--pictures from this weekend:


Abigail and Benjamin play with the new Little People toy we brought them. Abigail kept running into her room for "more peoples!" to put on the LP ferris wheel. Benjamin turned one on September 29.
Pregame (and probably the best part of the game)--the band takes the field.
We were right next to the tunnel, which meant we were surrounded by tons of little boys wanting to see the players and maybe, just maybe, get a high-five from them.
Band+ cheerleaders+Saddle Tramps+media+players+random other people = on field pregame madness
After spotting Missouri 21 points, Tech finally scores a touchdown just before the half.
Our friends Karen and Chris with their little girl, Kelly.
Amy and David with the new foam gun for Abigail, who has a collection of foam fingers (when you wear one, you have to say "Woohoo!")
Yep, Paul was still sick and probably shouldn't have been at the game but he insisted.
The band at halftime.
Kelly gets her guns up. We said it would be a shame if in 16 years, she says she's going to A&M.
The Masked Rider roaming the sidelines.
After halftime the team runs back on the field. Tech ended up losing to Missouri 38-21. Boo.

One more reason I love the guy

Paul has been sick since he got home from Washington, D.C. on Friday. Not wanting to catch whatever crud he managed to bring home, I chose to give him the bed and sleep downstairs. I slept on the couch Friday and Saturday night. The cat, loving that I was sleeping on the couch, spent much of both nights cruising all over me or lying on my feet or perpendicular to me, shoving me into the back of the couch. Needless to say, it wasn't very restful. Amazing how disruptful 12 lbs. of feline can be.

The past two nights, I've opted to sleep in the guest room since it actually has a bed in it. This is our "cat-free" room. We keep the door shut all the time so there is one mostly-hairless room for our guests with cat allergies. Having slept in the guest room previously, I knew exactly what the cat would do (and it was why I chose the couch over the weekend). For good hour to an hour and a half, Senor Jubjub positions himself outside the guest room door--meowing, pawing at the handle, pawing the door, meowing again and again and again. I think at one time he had his little nose pressed into the crack under the door to meow at me. He does eventually give up and goes elsewhere to sleep but it's a long time coming.

Last night, after both of us trying to ignore Jubjub for about 30 minutes, I heard Paul pad down the stairs to admonish the cat for being so noisy. He told the cat to "be quiet, get away from the door, she's trying to sleep." Initially, Jub didn't listen--stubborn little guy meowed a few more times just for good measure--but Paul did finally win the argument and the cat left for higher ground upstairs. And Paul got a hug and a very big smile from me.

And just because, a picture of the cat (where he isn't supposed to be) as taken by Paul: