Yesterday's phone call

Yesterday evening, I had a phone call from my sister Amy who requested that I talk to Abigail, not as an aunt but as a librarian.  After calming down a squalling Henry who had managed to get stuck under his swing, I heard an obviously upset little girl on the other end of the phone say, "Aunt Carrie, I can't find my library book." 

Poor girl was so upset that she lost her book.  Amy suggested they call me to let her know that it happens and it was OK.  Which is exactly what I told her.  She was surprised to learn that students 10 years older than her still lose library books as well.  I gave her the same list of places to look that I tell my students (bedroom, classroom, bookshelves, backpack--"It's not in my backpack!") and suggested she go tell her school librarian the next day because you never know.  Someone might have found the book and turned in if she left it in her classroom or the cafeteria.  After a little more reassuring that the librarian wouldn't be mad but Abigail might have to replace or pay for the book if it is lost, she seemed to feel a little better about the situation.

Enough to let me know that she did have good news--another lost tooth!  That is definitely not a bad thing to lose.

Wreck 'em, Tech (and get me some cocoa!)

Last weekend was Texas Tech's homecoming game. This year, I twisted Amy's arm and convinced her to come with her family and to stay in Lubbock overnight on Saturday. We were planning on meeting our friends Chris and Karen and their girls and just enjoying a great weekend in Lubbock with friends and family. Little did we know that a "mock-Arctic front" or some such meteorological term would definitely put a damper on all our plans.

When we left ABQ on Friday afternoon, it was nearly 70, sunny, and beautiful. When we arrived in Amarillo, it was 45, cloudy, and drizzly with little chance of it getting better. There was discussion as to whether or not the front would dip down to Lubbock so we were cautiously optimistic that we might be able to go through with our (limited) plans on Saturday.

Mother Nature had other plans. The weather definitely put a damper on our plans but I don't think our spirits--while we did go to Spanky's, the hamburger place across from campus, for fried cheese and burgers, we didn't walk around campus at all on Saturday. The hotel's swimming pool was indoors but the atrium area wasn't heated so swimming was off as well. We went to Raider Alley around 4:30 for dinner but it was cold to be standing around outside. Plus the band that was there was playing slow, mellow, moody music--not exactly what we'd like to hear to get pumped up before a game. We were bundled up but it just wasn't as much fun as it could have been.
Looking tough although she later decided that she didn't like these--they made her shy when the cheerleader was talking to her. Amy found the Double-T tattoo stickers and the kids switched out the eye black for the tattoos.
There's pretty much anything you can think to eat at Raider Alley including meat on a wee-little stick.

We headed into the stadium about 20 minutes before the game and went in search of hot cocoa. There was no hot chocolate to be had in the stadium. There was coffee and cold drinks. Plus, while we were searching for something warm-not-coffee, we missed the band coming onto the field which is easily the highlight of the game, especially this one.
Amy and Benjamin bundled up before the game got started.
Abigail watches the action on the field.

Apparently, K-State forgot that they were supposed to show up for a football game and by halftime, the score was 38-0 and the fans were beginning to leave in droves. We hearty souls made it until after the halftime performance. The band's show was a bit of a let-down as well. Who knew that Boston had more than one song? I didn't until the band decided to play four of them.
Yep, that says Texas Tech 38, K-State 0. The final score ended up being 66-14.
We'll say this was during "More Than a Feeling" which is the only Boston song I know.
Bundled up but ready to go. We were glad we had a blanket in the car to bring with us into the stadium. Thankfully, the wind wasn't blowing too much--it was just the rest of the weather that wasn't much fun.

By this point, the children were restless, we were restless, and the game was pretty much in hand. We left in search of something warm to drink at the Starbucks across the street from the stadium. As waited at the streetlight, a carload of college boys were yelling "Raider!" to which all the pedestrians were replying "Power!" I'd "taught" this to Abigail earlier as we were walking to the stadium. She thought it was a silly cheer until everyone at the crosswalk was participating--then it was more fun to do.
Goofing at Starbucks--Paul opted not to get something warm but continue to eat the kettle corn we'd gotten at the game.
Little arms make it hard to do rabbit ears, even when your mama ducks down some.
No one to help out didn't deter Abs from getting in the rabbit-ear action. She'll just do it herself.

From Starbucks, we headed back to the hotel to watch the rest of the game on the television while flipping around between some other, more competitive, games as well.

Sunday morning, it was still cold and drizzly and the indoor swimming pool was still closed. However, the hotel's breakfast did feature make-your-own Texas waffles. So we all had waffles shaped like Texas for breakfast, including the non-Texan who just thought it was fun to make his own waffle. More hanging around the hotel since it was too chilly to do much else and then we headed down to Gardski's for lunch because Paul had commented earlier about their onion straws and David likes it as well.
Quite the look from the four-year-old.
Picture by Abigail. She's getting much better than some of the past pictures I have. She even asked us to move the glasses so they wouldn't be in her shot.
Yep, David was there too. He's just hard to catch in a picture.

We left from there to head home, driving through some light fog and drizzle until about Santa Rosa. By the time we got home, it was about 70 and sunny again. The weekend wasn't quite what we'd hoped for and not exactly the experience we'd hoped Abigail and Benjamin would have for their first Texas Tech football game. Hopefully there will be many more games and much better weather for future football weekends. And if the children ever whine, we'll all tell them about this one game in 1992 when it was so cold and rainy and windy and that they just need to toughen up a bit.

More Thanksgiving fun

Just a few pictures from the Thanksgiving holiday. We didn't take very many--I was busy being busy and Paul didn't think to take pictures which is odd because he usually takes 100 pictures when we're doing nothing.

On Wednesday evening, Abigail was my designated helper. She's getting old enough that she can actually help do stuff and it's not more trouble than it's worth to have her around. Yes, it takes a little longer but not a significant amount of time. And hopefully, these will be things she'll remember because I know I will. We had fajitas for dinner so she helped with the guacamole and afterwards, she and Benjamin helped out with the pies. There was one casualty--our salt and pepper shakers look like eggs with legs and while I was getting stuff out for the pie, Abigail was playing with the salt shaker, making it "walk." It was an honest accident when one of the legs broke off--I could have set the thing down wrong and the same thing happen--and we weren't going to tell her mama. I did have her tell Uncle Paul what happened but I'm not good at quick thinking and confessed to Amy when she asked what happened to the missing salt shaker. But the pies were good, salt shakers can be replaced, and Abigail knows (and will hopefully remember) that she has to be more careful.I have a smattering of toys I keep at the house for when children visit. Last summer before Sarah and Matthew visited, I bought these giant pick-up sticks to have at the house for them. They never touched them but it was a big hit with Abigail this visit. She also loved a Barbie paper doll I got for my birthday a few years ago--she spent quite a bit of time making fancy outfits.Paul was probably teaching Benjamin how to spell bad words. Or (what actually was happening) Benjamin was drawing shapes and teaching them to Uncle Paul.
Amy and David scoured the ads for anything they just couldn't live without. We didn't find anything in the ads worthy of a very early rise but Paul, Amy, David, and I did go out shopping a little on Friday afternoon to get out of the house. On Saturday afternoon, all the girls went shopping as a little outing.
I used the good china for the main meal on Thursday. Jub apparently thought he should be included in the feast. Not so much, furry one. We didn't have room to serve family-style but I was glad we were all able to be seated at tables. And yes, even Abs and Ben got china at their place setting although Ben used an everyday plate when he finally decided to eat something and I helped Abigail carry her dinner and dessert plate because she was just a little too free with them, even when I kept saying two hands! two hands!
Paul's parents joined us for dinner on Thanksgiving day. It was nice that they were in town and that they were able to be with us. Roger was volunteered by Donna to carve the turkey and in turn, he volunteered her to finish us getting meat off the turkey when we were done. Paul was amazed because he thought he'd done a good job (not really) and then his mom steps in and gets twice as much meat off. We sent some home with Donna and Roger for turkey sandwiches and I've frozen a bunch of it for later consumption
Paul said the downside to using the good dishes is that it requires handwashing. Not that it takes more than 2 seconds to wash a plate and he was on drying duty--not even rinsing duty since he was complaining about the hot water.
Look at how much fun it can be to do dishes! Yay!
OK, this might be a little more fun than copious amounts of handwashing. Paul has bought several games for children to play when at the house. There is a matching game that was a hit this trip--even as an adult, it's more interesting/challenging than most of the other children's board games. Benjamin was playing until Abigail muscled him out of the way and he found it was more fun to just climb Uncle Paul.
Amy takes a try at the Guitar Hero. We picked up the Aerosmith Guitar Hero since it was on sale and :::fingers crossed::: Santa might bring us the new World Tour with a new guitar. It's that or new luggage.
On Friday afternoon, two of my lovely neighbors brought down a tin of Christmas cookies. One of them was a big iced sugar cookie. It was quickly claimed by the two little kids and the one great big kid who split it three ways.
Benjamin very methodically ate off all the icing and then ate the cookie. He is such a picky eater and he wasn't sure about the cookie. I think the rush of sugar after the icing convinced him that it wouldn't be so bad.
Friday evening, we went to Paul's parents' house for dinner. I'd had the kids grab a couple of toys to take over there but when we arrived, we found that Donna had gotten out all of Paul's old Legos and there were lots of them. Paul nearly pushed us all out of the way to get to the toys. They found the instructions for making the castle and set to work on it for the evening.
When they weren't "helping" with the castle, Abigail and Benjamin were running back to Paul's old bedroom to see the glow-in-the-dark star stickers Paul put on the ceiling over 20 years ago. The room has been repainted several times and Roger has painted the ceiling of pretty much every other room but this one because of the stickers. They still glow so we left the light on in the room during dinner so the kids could look at them. At one point, the kids took off their shoes so they could lie on the bed and stargaze.
While we were out on Friday afternoon, we also bought Wii Music because we thought it would be easy for the little ones to play. We were right and it was a hit with both of them since all that is really required is wiggling the controllers up and down. Even 3-year-old Benjamin picked up on it. Please note Abigail and I were both wearing our quasi-matching "fancy pants" while we playing on Saturday evening.
And in between all of this fun, we also went swimming on Friday and Saturday mornings with the kids and everyone went to Dion's for pizza on Saturday. It's the one place David always requests and there is the little platform for kids to watch them make pizzas so Abigail and Benjamin enjoy that as well. Mom and Dad had an early flight out on Sunday and Amy and her family left a little before Paul and I left for church.

It was a lovely weekend although we did miss having our Donna here and even if it does always feel like we're stepping over each other in my little house. I do like getting to have holidays in NM. Even being in charge of everything is in some ways easier than traveling around and about. But we'll be happy to drag over to Texas and possibly up to Kansas to see more family in three weeks.

The celebration of family

When I was a smallish child, I never quite comprehended that two sets of my grandparents both were friends with one couple. We'd go to my maternal grandparents' house and Kenneth and Vera would be there. Then we'd stop by the step-grandparents' house and lo and behold, Kenneth and Vera. My five-year-old self needed everyone neatly compartmentalized and this intermixing of people didn't fit. It wasn't until I got a little older that I realized that 1) I lived in a small town and 2) because it was a small town, my grandparents would likely know the same people. As a child, Vera always fascinated me because she wore the neatest hat--even as a little one, I was all about the accessories. It was a baseball cap with a short bill and a puffball on top (it looked kind of like this). I remember we called it the "girl's baseball hat" because of the short bill.

The point of that story (if there is one) was that at Granny's funeral, Kenneth and Vera were there but so were my paternal grandparents and a couple of great-aunts and great-uncle on that side of the family. It took a moment for me realize that of course those five people on my biological father's side knew my step-grandmother. It is a small town. I've heard my grandmother talk about being in a women's club with my granny when they were raising their families. Uncle Pete (who's real name is Howard but everyone calls him Pete for some reason that no one can now explain) hangs out down at the co-op, probably bumping into all the various members of my step-family. And despite any differences of opinions about my mom remarrying after my father's death, it would follow that my grandparents would pay their respects for mother of their grandchildren's step-dad (or their grandchildren's step-grandmother). I don't know if Abigail was perplexed by Grandmother and Granddad being at a thing with Grandpa, which hasn't happened often in her life or if she just thought well, whatever (I'm sure Benjamin was oblivious to all of it).

After the funeral service, Abigail and Benjamin went with Grandmother and Granddad to their house to play while the rest of us went to the graveside and the lunch afterwards. Afterwards, we all went to their house to visit for the afternoon. Abigail and Benjamin were playing out in the yard, just like we did as children, and Abigail had to show me the cellar and explain what it was all about. I know that cellar well. We all spent many hours playing in and on the cellar at Grandmother's house (it is probably 10 x 10 with concrete walls that are about two feet above ground--it seemed much bigger when we were smaller. And I still have never been in the "scary cellar" in the backyard.). After the children were good and dirty from running around outside and stomping in whatever puddles they could find leftover from Grandmother watering outside, we headed to Gene's house to visit with any family that was left there. As it was, it was my parents, my brothers, their wives and family as well as one cousin and two of her children. It was a nice evening of chatting with everyone, John made fajitas, and for whatever reason, we all ended up riding the 4-wheelers. In elementary school, I remember riding a 3-wheeler once (back before they were wisely deemed unsafe by all and everyone) but I'd not ridden a 4-wheeler. As we were zipping around in the field between Gene's and John's houses, Amy and I agreed that this was definitely fun. (Photos are all courtesy of Mom.)

Through a variety of discussions and mix-ups, I had my suitcase with me in Sunray which was fortunate since I had clothes to change into after the funeral. Notice Amy is still wearing her funeral attire, complete with heels, on the 4-wheeler. Keep it classy. (Even classier, we're going on a beer run to John's house.) We could not, for whatever reason, convince Donna to ride on the 4-wheeler. Everyone else was zipping around--even Benjamin got in on the action and would "drive" with his daddy on the 4-wheeler. But Donna had no interest. Amy finally convinced Donna to ride it with her. Once. The shrieks of terror emanating from that ride still reverberate in my head (and still make me giggle). I love the expression of utter fear on Donna's face as Amy goes over the berm in the field. (And even you have to admit that this is really funny, Donna.)
Abigail, however, loved every minute of it once we convinced her to ride with Uncle John. After that, she couldn't get enough. She and I rode together quite a bit. Abigail would throw her arms up in the air and yell "Yippee-ya-hoo!" and kept telling me to "go the speed limit!" Um, yeah. That's not happening. Once when Abigail was on with Lita, Abigail told her that she wanted to ride with me because I went faster--probably not but I'd goose it a little every little bit to give the idea that we were going faster. Sunday evening, Mom, Dad, Amy, David, the kids, and I went to Wonderland Park, the amusement park in Amarillo. When we got to Amy's house, Benjamin met us at the door with an excited, "We're going to CANDYLAND!" Sure. Something like that. I don't think I've been to Wonderland since 1993 but it hasn't changed much. A few new rides but still all the old stand-bys, like the log ride which is a favorite of mine (I'm a fan of roller coasters and log rides; not so much rides that spin and swirl and generally induce nausea).
You don't get very wet with a small kid in the front. You get even less wet when it's just you and the small kid. Abigail and I rode it once together and she was in the front by herself and as we were going down, she leaned forward to "hide" from the spray. I'm not sure we really caused a spray that time.
My dad and I went on the double-loop roller coaster together--the entire ride lasts less than a minute and I loved every second of it. Totally worth it. Amy and I ran off to ride the Cyclone--a "wild mouse" roller coaster with switchbacks and little bumps. We were laughing the entire time because we'd both go "Wooo!" in unison without intending too. This type of roller coaster always jerks you around but it's definitely one of my favorite things to ride at Wonderland. We also all hopped on the train for a ride around the park.
I don't think Granny would have minded one bit that this is how we spent our time together after the funeral--enjoying being together, enjoying being a family, and happy that we are able to be together even though it was a sad occasion that brought us all together in the first place.

The stages of grief

Perhaps denial (the first stage) was that Granny's death wasn't bothering me that much--that I was fine and everything was OK. And I definitely moved on past that one at a full-on sprint to the second stage of anger when I found myself yelling at my husband yesterday evening because he wasn't properly concerned about the fact that our refrigerator has quit working. Nevermind that I didn't even give him a chance to process what I'd just told him--I just started yelling about you don't care and I'm going to the store to get ice because we have a load of groceries in the freezer and it's melting and you don't care and I'll just do it myself and the DAMN THING'S BROKEN AND YOU DON'T EVEN CARE. Misplaced anger, perhaps? (The sobbing that followed most definitely wasn't about the fridge.)

I'm much sadder than I thought I would be or even realized I was until last night's meltdown. Since moving to ABQ, I've only seen Granny and Granddad a couple of times a year. I didn't realize how important those times I saw her actually were to me.

The funeral service was really nice and there were loads of lovely floral arrangements. Everyone behaved themselves--no great wailing or scenes were made (and we were all a little worried about one aunt doing just that). There was just an appropriate amount of crying done by all. Rather than a eulogy by the preacher, there was a photo montage of Granny's life--snapshots of her and her family throughout the years--a nice look at a lady who seemed to enjoy her life and the people in it. Not all the pictures were relevant to everyone but we could all appreciate different ones. I choked up when I saw the picture of Granny and Granddad at my wedding--they were both smiling and looked so happy. Granny told me later in the afternoon after our wedding that she was so happy she was able to be there because she did enjoy our weddings. I was happy she was there because they are my grandparents and I wanted them to be there for that reason. I didn't take anything from the house as a memento except the wedding photo of us with Granny and Granddad--Granny looks like I want to remember her. The photo in our wedding album is the only two of them so I'm glad to have this one, too. There another item or two I thought about asking for--little things I remembered from their house as I was growing up but I think one of my aunts has licked everything in the house to claim it for herself. I might ask at another time if I see the items still there on another visit. In the meantime, it just didn't seem worth going there with this aunt at the house. (She's not a very congenial person under the best of circumstances and she's being even more rotten to everyone now.)

On Sunday, Mom, Dad, and I went over to visit with Granddad at his house. He's doing OK--as good as can be expected when your wife of 62 years dies. On Sunday, he said the two dogs seemed a little sad since they just stick with him all the time. I told him I think we're all a little sad, not just the dogs.

There were some good times over the weekend--I think that's what a gathering like this should be. Everyone can cry and be sad because we had to bury someone we all loved but also enjoy and celebrate of the family we still have. And I'll post those pictures and more about that later.

Day Trip to Acoma

On a previous visit, Mom had said something about visiting Acoma Sky City on the Acoma Pueblo about an hour west of Albuquerque. We didn't have time on that trip to go so before she came on Tuesday, I suggested she pack appropriate shoes to walk around out there and we'd make the trek out there. Paul wanted to go with us on our "field trip" as he doesn't remember ever having gone but unfortunately, he wasn't able to get away from work. I'd gone once before as a chaperone on a school field trip. I know I missed a good portion since I was trying to herd middle school children so I was excited to go this time.

All the photos are courtesy of my mom. A photo permit is required while on the reservation and we opted to just get one. We went on Friday morning and had wonderful weather. It was windy earlier this week but thankfully, it was just a breeze out at Acoma. As you can see in the pictures, I don't think there was a cloud in the sky.

There was a great article in the May 2008 Smithsonian magazine about the Acoma Pueblo. It gives a great overview of the history of the pueblo, much of which was also covered on the tour. (There are also some comments below from various people that are worthwhile additions to the article.)

Rock formations on the the drive to the visitor's center:
The San Esteban del Rey Mission, a Catholic church on the mesa. Construction was begun in 1629. All the dirt for the cemetery at the church was brought up by the women and children (the cemetery is to the left of the church but isn't in the picture).
The bell tower on the church. The bell on the left was from Mexico and the bell on the right was a gift from the King of Spain (I believe) after construction was finished.
Ladders at the main kiva. The tops of the ladders are pointed to "pierce the clouds" in hopes of bringing rain. It was mentioned several times on the tour that the Acoma have a variety of beliefs about bringing rain to the region.
The "Enchanted Mesa" on the Acoma Pueblo.
Checking out the horno oven, traditionally used to fire pottery (although the guide mentioned that they aren't used as frequently for this anymore) and for cooking purposes.
One of the houses made with adobe bricks. The houses range from being made from sandstone, adobe, and modern materials (cinderblocks and stucco).
Looking up from part of the ancient stairway--the path originally used by the Acoma to get to the top of the mesa.
Heading down the ancient stairs--there are handholds in the rocks and some of the steps have been "improved" with larger rocks and concrete.
Mom near the bottom of the stairs.
Looking back toward the mesa from the visitor's center. We had lunch at the cafe there and Mom had fry bread for the first time. That's some good stuff.
At the overlook on the drive to Acoma Sky City.
A self-portrait.
We were back in Albuquerque by about 2:00 so it was a nice half-day trip and a nice reprieve from all that shopping. (OK, it's not like we were tearing it up shopping--just picking up a few things for our upcoming trip to England and doing some window shopping.)

Remodel Day Something: No news is no news

Nothing to report again today. It's like the horror stories you hear about contractors just taking off and never hearing from them again. Except I've heard from Alan both days I haven't seen him. So maybe it's nothing like that aside from the kitchen and dining room being a disheveled mess. Alan called this afternoon to let me know that the tile didn't come in today but hopefully it would be in tomorrow. The plan is to finish things up Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. I've got to give him a call tomorrow to let him know that the road in front of our house is being resurfaced on Wednesday. Of course. Hopefully he'll be able to either bring the tile saw by tomorrow afternoon or park at the corner on Wednesday morning to make it a bit easier.

My new bookcase was delivered this afternoon. It is currently in it's packing crate in the garage as I needed to repaint the dining room wall to touch up some spots left when I took down the shelves. I'd planned to get that done this weekend but I ended up making a quick trip to Amarillo to see my step-grandmother. I'm not as close to my step-grandparents as I'd like or as most expect after 30 years for a variety of reasons. Family dynamics are a funny thing, especially when it comes to blended families. But she is still my Granny and I really felt I needed to go after talking to my sister Amy on Friday evening. Granny has had COPD for the better part of a decade and was diagnosed with an aortic aneurysm on her esophagus last week. The family was all in this weekend to see her. For her peace, I do hope the end isn't too far away because it is heartbreaking to see her so frail. But on the other hand, it's hard to see the same sadness on my dad's face this weekend that Paul and I saw on his mom's face not too many months ago. I told Paul that this is what I was dreading--we lose one grandparent and then we start losing all of them. Thankfully, all the others seem to be doing OK given their ages and various ailments. I know that we are extremely fortunate to have any grandparents at our age and I'm selfish enough to want to keep them all around for a while longer.

For Mom & Amy

Here are pictures of you both looking quite pleasant at Christmas.

Amy, seeming pleased with her new portrait of Paul and me:

Amy, reading the new Christmas book to Benjamin. I think this is about as far as you got because Abigail had already wandered off and Benjamin wasn't too far behind her. But still, you look quite pleasant.
For Mom. I'm not sure why Paul couldn't get a picture of you smiling but I believe you were smiling when you opened this up. Or confused. We can't tell since we can only see your forehead. But your eyes are open.
Oh, not only were in you the kitchen, Mom, you were smiling while in there. And we managed to get the back of Donna's head but she is standing beside me so I do have that elusive shot of us together.
I was trying to just sit and look pleasant while we were in Kansas. I'm not sure how Paul does it but I do believe this look is hereditary.